Thank you for visiting the Perfection Paradox Media Room. Your time is valuable, so I won’t waste it – My goal is to make your job easier. That’s why I’ve created this online media room. Hopefully you’ll find everything you need here, but if not, please contact me and let me know what else you may need so we can provide it for you.
—Jeffrey A. Kramer
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Perfection. It doesn’t get any better than that. Or does it?
We pursue it, we expect it, we impose it, but it never quite happens. Instead, our pursuit of perfection does more damage than good. To our confidence, to our relationships, and to our capacity for a fulfilling life. But we keep seeking it.
In The Perfection Paradox, Jeffrey A. Kramer reveals his struggle with perfectionism through impactful and relatable stories, sharing simple but powerful tips to help perfectionists everywhere overcome their addiction to ideal and reclaim the life they deserve.
Part 1: Perfection – The Making of the Addict
The pursuit of perfection. It sounds appealing, after all, what is better than perfect. So why not get after it. For some it’s self-imposed because we have a burning desire to be great, or perhaps we are just wired that way. Others might feel pressured by our parents, teachers or other authority figures who tell us that our effort isn’t good enough, that we need to try harder. And for some the pressures are societal, trying to live up to the expectations of others based on what we see and hear around us. No matter what or who drives us to perfectionism, the earlier we begin the pursuit, and the harder we drive it, the stronger our addiction becomes.
Part 2: Paralysis – Life Inside the Paradox
The addiction starts out as a seemingly innocent desire to do great things. The perfectionist believes they are doing amazing work, that they are continuously approaching the perfect everything! Then reality sets in. Maybe our constant pursuit begins to create frustration, feelings of inadequacy, and then the need to cover for ourselves with a mask of perfection illusion. Or in some cases, our expectation of perfection from others causes us to ruin relationships and miss opportunities. The addiction even causes some of us to fall into other psychological disorders like obsessive/compulsive behaviors or attention difficulties. The paradox is revealed as we discover the damage that our pursuit of perfection delivers into our lives.
Part 3: Progress – Getting to Good Enough
In addiction recovery programs the professionals say the first step is acknowledging you have a problem. For perfectionists it isn’t so much acknowledgement of a problem as it is realization of what we have unwittingly done to ourselves and others. There is no 12-step program or in-patient recovery center for perfectionists. We have to find other ways to control our demon. Only when we admit the cause of our addiction, the results we have realized, and the ways we have covered for our self-perceived shortcomings, can the struggle of undoing allow us to progress from perfect, to good enough.
Jeffrey A. Kramer is an author, coach and speaker who spent nearly 35 years building better communities as an award-winning engineer and construction manager for government agencies. He spent every one of those years as an obsessive perfectionist, paralyzed by the idea that he wasn’t good enough, aggravating others with impossible expectations, and compensating for a fear of being exposed as an imposter by overachieving, collecting credentials, and moving on before anyone could find him out.
Now a recovering perfectionist who has overcome his addiction to ideal, Jeff founded Ascension Leadership Group to follow his passion to focus on building people by helping them Clarify their Calling, Overcome their Obstacles, and Define their Direction so they become Perfectly Unhackable and are encouraged, equipped and empowered to become Ascending Leaders and reach new heights of success.
Jeff is a certified leadership development and personal growth coach, speaker and trainer with the John Maxwell and Igniting Souls Teams. He is also a licensed Empowerment Mentoring Facilitator, and a certified Human Behavior Consultant able to administer and debrief the DISC and Maxwell Leadership Assessments.
An amateur photographer, avid reader, and former athlete who unapologetically cries tears of joy when the national anthem plays during the Olympic games, Jeff and his wife Sharon live in Arizona, where they share four amazing daughters and a love of the desert southwest.
Jeff has pledged to donate 10% of all profits from sales of The Perfection Paradox to Folds of Honor, an organization that provides educational scholarships to the spouses and children of America’s fallen and disabled service members.
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